Monday, August 17, 2009

DAY EIGHTYONE - visions of tomorrow

Greetings beloved
Today I feel low, really low... and have done so for a couple of days. I feel empty, disillusionized, thinking about where I am in life. I woke up just to find that my vision and dreams do not match my current state even with all good will in the world, except for one thing - my family (Isak, Agnes and Linda). I'm constantly walking around in a bubble, daydreaming of being somewhere else...

As I opened my eyes I saw before me the glade where the kids used to play. Now they had walked with their mother to the gardens to prepare lunch. It was close to noon and I was starting to feel hungry. The sun was sprinkleing thru the leaves of the treas and the air was warm. A soft gust of wind made the leaves dance and the spots from the sun wink at me as I looked up. Something moved in the tree, probably a bird. I sat there for a while just staring. And then I moved my eyes to the glade and the small houses made of clay and wood surrounding it. I looked at the people working, relaxing and playing. About 20 persons divided in 6 families lived there, with only the most necessary contact with society.

The glade was really a permaculture garden filled with eatables. Right next to the glade, to the south and west, where the biodynamic allotments and on the east side was the lake. North of the small settlement was the fruit forest. It was also a cultivated forest made up of fruit trees, bushes with berries and nut trees. A couple of hundred meters to the northwest was the well. Pure spring water that flowed from the base of the ridge that streched from northeast to the west. Further south the landscape was more hilly and rough. I sat there with my own thoughts and didn't hear them comming. Suddenly someone put their hands over my eyes. I shrugged from the sudden occurance and tried to turn around. The person behind me danced along as I swung my body back and forth a couple of times and then she started to laugh.

I instantly recognised her soft voice. How could I not. I had seen her grow up from a small and helpless baby to becomming a strong and loving woman soon to turn seventeen. She was always happy, smiling almost constantly. She sat down beside me on mt left, my son on the opposite side of the table. As they did they set the table and I put my work down for the present. In a few seconds the table was set and as an angel she entered the scene. She was beautifully dressed in a light dress that brought out the best of her female body. She was as attractive on the outside as she was brilliant and loving on the inside. The shadows from the leaves danced over her and I felt the gratitude and love flood me. I smiled to her and she looked at me kindly, and then she let a warm smile conqour her face, almost knocking me of my chair. She put the food on the table and sat down on my right side. We united our hands in a circle and prepared for eating...

This is where I am - in my mind.
May all forces arise to make my dream come thru.
In divine love and sound health
your servant

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